A Most Approved Address (1859)
Dedicated To All Aspirants For Legislative Honours.
By Jupiter Tonans, Wampy Wampy Flats.
Come, all you gallant voters, by one, by two, by three,
Come forward, free electors, and pledge your votes to me ;
For I'm the Representative you've been sighing for so long,
I'll vote for anything you want, whether it's right or wrong ;
I'll open all the lands for sale (our war cry is "unlock")--
I'll pledge you every working man shall get a good big block ;
I'll cut up all the squattages, that take up to much ground ;
Unlock survey (ne'er mind the pay) shall echo all around ;
No longer shall a grazing right extend above a mile ;
My goodness ! won't this scheme of mine these blessed squatters rile ?
I'll bring in Education, on a scale both large and free--
National or Denominational, 'tis all the same to me.
Whichever you shall please prefer, or if you like them both,
You'll get them, on my honour, or rather on my oath !
I know precisely what you want, so elect me and I'll try
To get you everything as soon as I'm in the Assembly.
I most earnestly assure you I'm not personally swayed
By any selfish motives, so pray don't be afraid,
But come, my gallant voters, by four, by five, by six,
And I'll engage the Government will soon be in a fix.
I'll do all you can require for voters high and low :
Ah! there's applause ! Hold up both hands ! Ah ! that's the sort of show !
I feel I am elected. Ah, Joy ! delight, sublime !
I'm now M.P., a thing I wished in vain for a long time !
Most liberal electors ! accept my thanks, sincere ;
My feelings I cannot express. Oh ! that's a glorious cheer !
One topic I've not touched upon, a trifle called State aid,
But if you don't approve of it your money shan't be paid.
I'll take care you're at no expense, but that you quite approve ;
And if parsons are objections, I'll soon that class remove.
From your cheers enthusiastic I certainly must be
The man you've placed your hopes upon, and quietly you will see
You've one who won't abuse his trust, but work both night and day,
To serve your interests alone--of my own I nothing say.
Thanks, thanks, dear friends, for your applause, the tear is in my eye !
I'll use this green silk handkerchief, and bid you all good bye.
Notes
From the NSW newspaper the Armidale Express and New England General Advertiser Saturday 2 July 1859, p. 4.